190 days to go

"And so I'm for medical liability at the federal level."
     —Discussing his support of medical liability reform; Washington, D.C.; March 10, 2006

191 days to go

"The only things that I can tell you is that every case I have reviewed I have been comfortable with the innocence or guilt of the person that I've looked at. I do not believe we've put a guily...I mean innocent person to death in the state of Texas."
     —Interviewed on NPR's All Things Considered; June 16, 2000

One of myriad classic Freudian slips for Dubya. Hear the interview here on NPR's Web site.

192 days to go

"I regret that a private comment I made to the vice-presidential candidate made it through the public airways."
     —Allentown, PA; September 5, 2000

193 days to go

"Listen, I want to thank leaders of the—in the faith—faith-based and community-based community for being here."
     —Washington, D.C.; September 6, 2005

What did he say?

194 days to go

"I am a person who recognizes the fallacy of humans."
     —Appearing on The Oprah Winfrey Show; September 19, 2000

195 days to go

"The government is not the surplus's money, Vice President."
     —As quoted in The Washington Post; November 5, 2000

Not quite sure if Dubya is addressing Dick or the budget here.

196 days to go

"I tell people, let's don't fear the future, let's shape it."
     —Omaha, NE; June 7, 2006

197 days to go

"The CIA laid out several scenarios and said life could be lousy, life could be OK, life could be better, and they were just guessing as to what the conditions might be like."
     —New York, NY; September 21, 2004

198 days to go

"What I'm suggesting to you is, if you can't name the foreign minister of Mexico, therefore, you know, you're not capable of what you do. But the truth of the matter is you are, whether you can or not."
     —As quoted in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer; November 6, 1999

199 days to go

"The point is, this is a way to help inoculate me about what has come and is coming."
     —Discussing his anti-Al Gore advertisement in an interview with The New York Times; September 2, 2000

WTF?? Finally, under 200 days to go.

200 days to go

"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three nonfatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it."
     —Philadelphia, PA; May 14, 2001

201 days to go

"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."
     —Gulfport, MS; September 20, 2005

Mo' betta, mo' betta, mo betta'...

202 days to go

"And Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job."
     —To FEMA director Mike Brown, who resigned ten days later amid criticism over his job performance; Mobile, AL; September 2, 2005

Mike Brown continued the lies during a Congressional investigation by going on record stating Louisiana Governor Kathleen Blanco never asked for Federal aid for New Orleans.

203 days to go

"After the bombing, most Iraqis saw what the perpetuators of this attack were trying to do."
     —On the bombing of the Golden Mosque of Samarra in Iraq; Washington, D.C.; March 13, 2006

204 days to go

"They have miscalculated me as a leader."
     —Westminster, CA; September 13, 2000

Only as a leader?

205 days to go

"There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids, upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but, having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like."
     —Washington, D.C.; December 11, 2002

WTF is he talking about??

206 days to go

"I don't know whether I'm going to win or not, I think I am. I do know I'm ready for the job. And, if not, that's just the way it goes."
     —Des Moines, IA; August 21, 2000

Any idiot who voted for Dubya deserves everything coming to them.

207 days to go

"It's important for young men and women who look at the Nebraska champs to understand that quality of life is more than just blocking shots."
     —Remarks to the University of Nebraska women's volleyball team, the 2000 national champions; Washington, D.C.; May 31, 2001

Dubya thought he was attending a roast of the women's volleyball team.

208 days to go

"I'm the master of low expectations."
     —Aboard Air Force One; June 4, 2003

Please meet President Select, George W. Bush.

209 days to go

"If it were to rain a lot, there is concern from the Army Corps of Engineers that the levees might break. And so, therefore, we're cautious about encouraging people to return at the moment in history."
     —Washington, D.C.; September 19, 2005

Sadly, nobody told Dubya that the levees already broke three weeks prior to this statement.

210 days to go

"You took an oath to defend our flag and our freedom, and you kept that oath under seas and under fire."
     —Addressing war veterans; Washington, D.C.; January 10, 2006

The sad thing is that most of the veterans think Dubya is great.

211 days to go

"We want to develop defenses that are capable of defending ourselves and defenses capable of defending others."
     —Washington, D.C.; March 29, 2001

212 days to go

"Those of us who spent time in the agricultural sector and in the heartland, we understand how unfair the death penalty is."
     —Omaha, NE; February 28, 2001

That's quite an analogy.

213 days to go

"This case has had full analyzation and has been looked at a lot. I understand the emotionality of death penalty cases."
     —As quoted in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer; June 23, 2000

214 days to go

"I don't have to accept their tenants. I was trying to convince those college students to accept my tenants. And I reject any labeling me because I happened to go to the university."
     —Appearing on NBC's Today show; February 23, 2000

215 days to go

"I think it's really important for this great state of baseball to reach out to people of all walks of life to make sure that the sport is inclusive. The best way to do it is to convince little kids how to—the beauty of playing baseball."
     —Washington, D.C.; February 13, 2006

Still stumbling over two opposing thoughts at one time...

216 days to go

"[I'm] occasionally reading, I want you to know, in the second term."
     —Washington, D.C.; March 16, 2005

Well, that's better than not reading at all during the first term.

217 days to go

"Well, I think if you say you're going to do something and don't do it, that's trustworthiness."
     —CNN online chat; August 30, 2000

This was most notably Dubya's last online chat.

218 days to go

"I'm also mindful that man should never try to put words in God's mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else to God. We are in no way, shape, or form should a human being play God."
     —Appearing on ABC's 20/20; Washington, D.C.; January 14, 2005

No, there aren't any typos in that quote.

219 days to go

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."
     —Saginaw, MI; September 29, 2000

220 days to go

"Actually, I—this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about—when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me."
     —Appearing on MSNBC's Hardball with Chris Matthews; May 31, 2000

Damn right.

221 days to go

"I mean, if you've ever been a governor of a state, you understand the vast potential of broadband technology, you understand how hard it is to make sure that physics, for example, is taught in every classroom in the state. It's difficult to do. It's, like, cost-prohibitive."
     —Washington, D.C.; June 24, 2004

Well, Dubya is right, quantum physics is, like, hard.

222 days to go

"I talked about making the death tax permanent so that Rolf can pass his assets from—to a family member if he so chooses."
     —After meeting with small-business owners; O'Fallon, MO; March 18, 2002

223 days to go

"I can't tell you what it's like to be in Europe, for example, to be talking about the greatness of America. But the true greatness of America are the people."
     —Visiting the Jefferson Memorial; Washington, D.C.; July 2, 2001

224 days to go

"So please give cash money to organizations that are directly involved in helping save lives—save the life who had been affected by Hurricane Katrina."
     —Washington, D.C.; September 6, 2005

225 days to go

"I can't wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbors back into neighborhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs."
     —Poplarville, MS; September 5, 2005

226 days to go

"I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things."
     —Aboard Air Force One; June 4, 2003

I just do what Dick tells me to do.

227 days to go

"I think we agree, the past is over."
     —As quoted by The Dallas Morning News; May 10, 2000

228 days to go

"He's kind of a—probably feeling his oats pretty good about that time."
     —Describing the moment when Rabbi Mark Borovitz met his wife, Harriet; Faith-Based and Community Incentives Conference; Los Angeles, CA; March 3, 2004

Aaawww yeeaahhh, feelin' the oats of the best part about it!!

229 days to go

"People say, how can I help on this war against terror? How can I fight evil? You can do so by mentoring a child; by going into a shut-in's house and say 'I love you.'"
     —Washington, D.C.; September 19, 2002

230 days to go

"Listen, Al Gore is a very tough opponent. He is the incumbent. He represents the incumbency. And a challenger is somebody who generally comes from the pack and wins, if you're going to win. And that's where I'm coming from."
     —Detriot, MI; September 7, 2000

If you're going to win, you're a challenger, but only if you come from the pack...

231 days to go

"A submarine could take this place out."
     —Surveying the Arkansas River while visiting the Clinton Presidential Center, as quoted in The Guardian; Little Rock, AR; November 18, 2004

Hmmm, a little foreshadowing??

232 days to go

"As you can possibly see, I have an injury myself—not here at the hospital, but in combat with a cedar. I eventually won. The cedar gave me a little scratch."
     —After visiting with wounded veterans from the Amputee Care Center of Brooke Army Medical Center; San Antonio, TX; January 1, 2006

I bet the vets really appreciated that story...

233 days to go

"I always jest to people, the Oval Office is the kind of place where people stand outside, they're getting ready to come in and tell me what for, and they walk in and get overwhelmed by the atmosphere. And they say 'Man, you're looking pretty.'"
     —Washington, D.C.; November 4, 2004

Again, what the hell is he talking about??

234 days to go

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."
     —As quoted by Reuters; May 5, 2000

As scary as it is, this is the method of reasoning that got us into the mess we're in now.

235 days to go

"I am mindful of the difference between the executive branch and the legislative branch. I assured all four of these leaders that I know the difference, and that differences is they pass the laws and I execute them."
     —Washington, D.C.; December 18, 2000

I execute 'em.

236 days to go

"The march to war affected the people's confidence. It's hard to make investment. See, if you're a small-business owner or a large-business owner and you're thinking about investing, you've got to be optimistic when you invest. Except when you're marching to war, it's not a very optimistic thought, is it? In other words, it's the opposite of optimistic when you're thinking you're going to war."
     —Springfield, MO; February 9, 2004

War, it's a m-effer.

237 days to go

"The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the—the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice."
     —Washington, D.C.; October 28, 2003

The truth comes out again. President Bush wants to kill all the Iraqis who want to live in a free world.

238 days to go

"If you're a younger person, you ought to be asking members of Congress and the United States Senate and the president what you intend to do about it. If you see a train wreck coming, you ought to be saying 'What are you going to do about it, Mr. Congressman, or Madam Congressman?'"
     —Detroit, MI; February 8, 2005

239 days to go

"Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house—he's lost his entire house—there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch."
     —Mobile, AL; September 2, 2005

240 days to go

"Quotas are bad for America. It's not the way America is all about."
     —St. Louis, MO; October 18, 2000

241 days to go

Bush: I talked to my little brother, Jeb—I haven't told this to many people. But he's the governor of—I shouldn't call him my little brother—my brother, Jeb, the great governor of Texas.
Jim Lehrer: Florida.
Bush: Florida. The state of Florida.
     —Appearing on The NewsHour with Jim Lehrer; April 27, 2000

Simply amazing that this moron was selected President...

242 days to go

"If he's—the inferences is that somehow he thinks slavery is a, is a noble institution—I would—I would strongly reject that assumption. That John Ashcroft is an open-minded, inclusive person."
     —Interview with Tom Brokaw; NBC Nightly News; January 15, 2001

243 days to go

"The students at Yale came from all different backgrounds and all parts of the country. Within months, I knew many of them."
     —From A Charge to Keep, by George W. Bush, published November 1999

Months?? Really.

244 days to go

"There's not going to be enough people in the system to take advantage of people like me."
     —On the coming Social Security crisis; Wilton, CT; June 9, 2000

245 days to go

"The best place for the facts to be done is by somebody who's spending time investigating it."
     —Expressing hope that the probe into how CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity was leaked will yield answers; Washington, D.C.; July 18, 2005

Git 'er done.

246 days to go

"We can come together to heal whatever wounds may exist, whatever residuals there may be."
     —Washington, D.C.; December 18, 2000

247 days to go

"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."
     —Austin, TX; December 20, 2000

Hemispheric and atmospheric are all really the same. Aren't they?? Duh.

248 days to go

"Reading is the basics for all learning."
     —Announcing the "Reading First" initiative; Reston, VA; March 28, 2000

Reading, Riting, and Rithmetic.

249 days to go

"That's why I went to the Congress last September and proposed fundamental—supplemental funding, which is money for armor and body parts and ammunition and fuel."
     —Erie, PA; September 2, 2004

Deftly displaying his understanding of war.

250 days to go

"I'll be glad to talk about ranching, but I haven't seen the movie. I've heard about it. I hope you go—you know—I hope you go back to the ranch and the farm is what I'm about to say."
     —Explaining that he hasn't yet seen Brokeback Mountain; Manhattan, KS; January 23, 2006

The evasive answer is either a confirmation that Dubya has in fact seen the movie or that he is truly an idiot.

251 days to go

"I don't think we need to be subliminable about the differences between our views on prescription drugs."
     —Orlando, FL; September 12, 2000

Somebody has been dipping into the Rx bottle...

252 days to go

"These people don't have tanks. They don't have ships. They hide in caves. They send suiciders out."
     —Speaking about terrorists; Portsmouth, NH; November 1, 2002

253 days to go

"There may be some tough times here in America. But this country has gone through tough times before, and we're going to do it again."
     —Waco, TX; August 13, 2002

Let's do those tough times again!

254 days to go

"My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the—in the Middle East to do everything they can to stop the violence, to tell the different parties involved that peace will never happen."
     —Crawford, TX; August 13, 2001

Finally, a glimpse of the truth.

255 days to go

"Other Republican candidates may retort to personal attacks and negative ads."
     —Fund-raising letter from George W. Bush; as quoted in The Washington Post; March 24, 2000

He didn't just think it, he wrote it down!

256 days to go

"This is a nation that loves our freedom, loves our country."
     —Washington, D.C.; May 17, 2002

257 days to go

"If you found somebody that had information about an attack on America, you'd want to know as best as we can to find out what the facts are."
     —Philadelphia, PA; December 12, 2005

258 days to go

"I think he needs to stand up and say if he thought the president were wrong on policy and issues, he ought to say where."
     —Interview with The Associated Press; August 11, 2000

259 days to go

"And, most importantly, Alma Powell, secretary of Colin Powell, is with us."
     —Referring to the wife of Colin Powell; Washington, D.C.; January 30, 2003

That's alright, Barbara Bush was often referred to as the mother of Bush 41.

260 days to go

"They can get in line like those who have been here legally and have been working to become a citizenship in a legal manner."
     —Referring to immigrant workers; Washington, D.C.; December 20, 2004

¿Qué dijo?

261 days to go

"Bit if you've been laid off work, you're 100 percent unemployed, and I worry about it."
     —Green Bay, WI; September 3, 2001

Whew, I'm glad we've got Dubya on the job! If he's worrying about it, then something is gettin' done.

262 days to go

"The senator has got to understand if he's going to have—he can't have it both ways. He can't take the high horse and then claim the low road."
     —Florence, SC; February 17, 2000

OK...

263 days to go

"But Iraq has—have got people there that are willing to kill, and they're hard-nosed killers. And we will work with the Iraqis to secure their future."
     —Washington, D.C.; April 28, 2005

264 days to go

"The important question is, How many hands have I shaked."
     —Answering a question about why he hasn't spent more time in New Hampshire; The New York Times; October 23, 1999

I too prefer my martinis shaken.

265 days to go

"The point now is how do we work together to achieve important goals. And one such goal is a democracy in Germany."
     —Washington, D.C.; May 5, 2006

Breaking news: Dubya thinks Germany is still communist.

266 days to go

"How do you know if you don't measure if you have a system that simply suckles kids through?"
     —Explaining the need for educational accountability; Beaufort, SC; February 16, 2000

Is he talking about measuring the system or measuring the amount of suckling?!?

267 days to go

"It means your own money would grow better than that which the government can make it grow. And that's important."
     —On what private accounts could do for Social Security funds; Falls Church, VA; April 29, 2005

268 days to go

"[I]t's a myth to think I don't know what's going on. It's a myth to think that I'm not aware that there's opinions that don't agree with mine, because I'm fully aware of that."
     —Philadelphia, PA; December 12, 2005

Does he know that we know that he knows if every thinks he's stupid?

269 days to go

"Really proud of it. A great campaign. And I'm really pleased with the organization and the thousands of South Carolinians that worked on my behalf. And I'm very gracious and humbled."
     —Appearing on ABC's This Week; February 20, 2000

Modest too.

270 days to go

"I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep on the soil of a friend."
     —On the prospect of visiting Denmark; Washington, D.C.; June 29, 2005

:)

271 days to go

"The way I like to put it is this. There's no bigger issue for the president to remind the moms and dads of America, if you happen to have a child, be fortunate to have a child."
     —Washington, D.C.; March 7, 2001

272 days to go

"I'm gonna talk about the ideal world, Chris. I've read—I understand reality. If you're asking me as the president, would I understand reality, I do."
     —Discussing abortion on MSNBC's Hardball with Chris Matthews; May 31, 2000

Even Chris Matthews has to commend Dubya on this crafty response to dodging the question.

273 days to go

"I think if you know what you believe, it makes it a lot easier to answer questions. I can't answer your question."
     —In response to a question about whether he wished he could take back any of his answers in the first debate; Reynoldsburg, OH; October 4, 2000

This single quote pretty much sums it ALL up.

274 days to go

"I understand small-business growth. I was one."
     —New York Daily News; February 19, 2000

I Am America (And So Can You!)

275 days to go

"I think we are welcomed. But it was not a peaceful welcome."
     —On the reception of American forces in Iraq; Philadephia, PA; December 12, 2005

Yes, I've often been welcomed by strangers with gun fire and road-side bombs.

276 days to go

"I don't want to win? If that were the case why the heck am I on the bus sixteen hours a day, shaking thousands of hands, giving hundreds of speeches, getting pillared in the press and cartoons and still staying on message to win?"
     —As quoted by Newsweek; February 28, 2000

277 days to go

"I was going to say he's a piece of work, but that might not translate too well. Is that all right, if I call you a 'piece of work'?"
     —To Jean-Claude Juncker, prime minister of Luxembourg; Washington, D.C.; June 20, 2005

Sure, as long as I can call you a piece of shit.

278 days to go

"God loves you, and I love you. And you can count on both of us as a powerful message that people who wonder about their future can hear."
     —Los Angeles, CA; March 3, 2004

279 days to go

"I've changed my style somewhat, as you know. I'm less—I pontificate less, although it may be hard to tell it from this show. And I'm more interacting with people."
     —Meet the Press; February 13, 2000

280 days to go

"We got people working all their life at hard work, contributing by payroll taxes into a Social Security system."
     —Washington, D.C.; May 13, 2005

281 days to go

"You might want to comment on that, Honorable."
     —To New Jersey secretary of state, the Honorable DeForest B. Soaries, Jr.; as quoted by Dana Milbank in The Washington Post; July 15, 2000

282 days to go

"[T]he best way to find these terrorists who hide in holes is to get people coming forth to describe the location of the hole, is to give clues and data."
     —Washington, D.C.; December 15, 2003

Bush can't find the hole...

283 days to go

"If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign."
     —Hilton Head Island, SC; February 16, 2000

At least Bush admits his campaign had no principles.

284 days to go

"As governor of Texas, I have set high standards for our public schools, and I have met those standards."
     —CNN online chat; August 30, 2000

I really, really doubt that.

285 days to go

"I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what's moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves."
     —Washington, D.C.; September 21, 2003

286 days to go

"I'm confident we can work with Congress to come up with an economic stimulus package that will send a clear signal to the risk-takers and capital formators of our country."
     —Washington, D.C.; September 17, 2001

287 days to go

"There are some monuments where the land is so wide-spread, they just encompass as much as possible. And the integral part of the—the precious part, so to speak—I guess all land is precious, but the part that the people uniformly would not want to spoil, will not be despoiled. But there are parts of the monument lands where we can explore without affecting the overall environment."
     —Media round table; Washington, D.C.; March 13, 2001

I've read this many times, but can't really figure out WTF Bush is trying to say.

288 days to go

"We've had leaks out of the administrative branch, had leaks out of the legislative branch, and out of the executive branch and the legislative branch, and I've spoken out consistently against them, and I want to know who the leakers are."
     —Chicago, IL; September 30, 2003

289 days to go

"I think anybody who doesn't think I'm smart enough to handle the job is underestimating."
     —As quoted in U.S. News & World Report; April 3, 2000

Don't misunderestimate me.